I failed to make him part of myself. I did everything a little girl, a woman, and a human being itself could possibly do. I am here writing this to the next woman who loves him. I failed to make him mine but I don’t want you to lose him.
You have no idea who I am, but will. I am sure that you will know a lot about me. I will be the one that fills his stories of heartbreak, I will be the girl that he messed up all with. You will probably get very annoyed of hearing my name by him and I promise you that I will also have the same reaction of yours. He will fill your mind with the stories of mine, while his friends will fill my mind with the stories of you.
To The Next Woman Who Loves Him
You will be the next woman who loves him and this thought haunts me, but sometimes I feel blessed by getting away from him. I am sure that you will know how he treated me poorly, lied to my face, cheated on me and ruined all we had. It seems that I have plenty of anger towards him. Despite this, I still wish him nothing but happiness. I accept the fact that you just may be the person who introduces this happiness to his life.
I failed to make him part of my life. I did everything that I could do. I waited for him, for days, weeks, months and year but he was just never mine. I hate saying this because I want him to be mine. I love him and I made him happy in ways that I could do, as I promised him that I would. My diary is full of him, all of my thoughts are about him. My scars are full of him. Just look at this sunset, I see him every morning and evening besides me, holding me and hugging me tightly and making me believe that he is always mine. But, this is all illusion, every day, every single time.
I sit here every day, thinking about him, but he was always running away from me. He was running away from the little girl he had fallen in love with. Our love was like a mother carrying her child, we carried each other and fed each other with love. We were stubborn some nights but my love still accepted him like he was always mine. I know I haven’t got him in this world.
I know I can not reach him but you can. You can every day and night so please listen to me. Please don’t leave him and please please be stubborn back when he says he doesn’t want to eat, feed him. Sit for hours just don’t walk away. Make him happy, pull silly faces so he gets grumpy but when he gets grumpy quickly tickle him and never stop even when he tells you to. Let him taste his laughter.
Please keep him safe in your arms and stroke his hairs every time he wraps his arms around you. He loves the color blue and he will point to each star that will remind him of you, don’t laugh and make fun of him when he tries to show his love but give him your warm kisses.
Please don’t let him lose you, don’t let him lose you like I did. I was bad, I was weak. I was bad because he loved me so much and I loved him even more and that’s bad because today he is gone. And I am one who is full of scars in his name. I am bad because I loved him in a way he couldn’t let go of me but look today he ran away from me. I don’t know who you are and where you are but please look after him because he is always been placed in the softest parts of my soul.
Sometimes we would laugh at the times we thought we would lose each other and today I am laughing innocently for giving him away. I won’t ever find myself again, I won’t find another him again. I know I have lost him but I promise he is still part of me. Please take care of another woman’s love. That part is hurting me, that there will be the next woman who loves him.
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